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Writting a check

A very tired nurse walks into a bank,
Totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift.
Preparing to write a check,
She pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse
And tries to write with it.
When she realizes her mistake,
She looks at the flabbergasted teller
And without missing a beat, she says:
‘Well, that’s great….that’s just great….
Some asshole’s got my pen!’ [...]

Drunken

A husband wakes up at home with a huge hangover.
He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees
is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table.
He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and
pressed. He looks around the room and sees [...]

Buttock

A married couple were in a terrible accident where the man’s
face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband
that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because
he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some
of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor
felt was suitable would [...]

Priceless

Billy Graham was returning
to Charlotte after a
speaking engagement
and when his plane arrived there was a limousine there
to transport him to his home. As he prepared to get
into the limo,
he stopped
and spoke to the driver.
“You know”
he said,
“I am 87 years old
and I have never
driven a limousine.
Would you mind if I
drove it for a while?”
The driver said,
“No [...]